If we’re being honest, every quilter has a UFO… or five… or twelve… No judgment! But how can retreats give you the finishing power to break the UFO cycle?
Seriously, how do we break the UFO cycle? Let’s be real, at home, by ourselves in our little sewing caves, finishing a project is like finishing the Boston Marathon. A lot of work and one heck of an accomplishment.
And there’s really no judgment here. Projects stall for all kinds of perfectly normal reasons. Regular life interruptions, decision fatigue (hello, binding avoidance), loss of momentum, boredom or a lack of inspiration (it’s starting to feel like a chore).
I get it, we all want to be a stay-at-home quilt-mom. You’ve thought about it, haven’t you?
At home, sewing gets squeezed between responsibilities. We have work, school drop off/pick up, sports, parent-teacher conferences, and overtime hours for that boss who’s really annoying. Just as we sit down, someone needs to be fed, or you finally realize you have to pee.
Somehow, even if you’re retired, you have a wildly busy life. What happened to that idea of getting extra rest once you retire?
Projects get packed away and forgotten about because we have a never-ending to-do list of things that are a higher priority. That is life.
And you don’t have a long string of UFOs because you lack discipline. No, this is an environment problem.
Enter, quilting retreats.
No laundry, no one to make dinner for, no constant interruptions, and nothing else to do but sew.
Quilt retreats create something you don’t have at home… A finish line.
The “Retreat Finish Line” Is a Real Thing
Retreats create something unique that you just don’t get at home. You get a defined block of time with a clear start and end. You know how long the retreat is, and while yes, there is lots of socialization and chatting, everyone else will also be quilting. You can chat and sew at the same time.
No one will be judging you for no eye contact or “distracted chatting.” Everyone is in the same boat, doing the same thing.
Unlike sewing at home, you don’t have the constant interruptions where you have to get up and go do something else (hello, everyone needs a snack just as you sit down), and there’s no “I’ll do it later” issues. You’re stuck. What else could you possibly do at a quilting retreat than sew?
In fact, many quilters actually bring their WIPs, their almost finished quilts, their binding they’ve been putting off for months, or those projects that they just can’t seem to stay focused on and get through.
Here’s the trick to success at retreats… You don’t just bring projects to a retreat—you bring the ones you actually want to finish.
Why UFOs Finally Move at Retreats
Sure, we all get that retreats are just focused on sewing, and that’s great. But what stops you from getting distracted when you’re surrounded by people? What makes retreats so inherently successful?
1. Your setup stays set up
You have room to set things up the way you want. You don’t have to shove your sewing space into a small chunk of your dining room. You get your space and your preference for setup.
And the best part is, it’s not a wheel-in/wheel-out situation. Your setup stays set up for all of the days of the retreat. You often get to set up the night before, so when you arrive on day one, you’re already ready to go. There’s no annoying packing and unpacking business. Trust me, that often stops me from even wanting to start.
What’s so good about this? You don’t lose momentum between sessions. You get to pick everything right back up where you left off. It’s in the same order, even the exact stitch. There’s no forgetting what you were doing because it’s been so long; you just step right back into it.
2. Decisions get made faster
You are literally surrounded by other quilting experts who are more than happy to jump in and help you make decisions and avoid decision fatigue. At home, you have a spouse who’s potentially not interested, kids who really couldn’t care less, and a cat (or 3) who does nothing but judge you.
But at a retreat? You have a bunch of people ready (and strongly willing) to tell you exactly what they think and why.
Need help deciding on that border? Fabric choice? The best way to piece a curve? Ask the table. If there is one thing quilters love more than quilting, it’s talking about quilting. Instant feedback means less overwhelm for you.
3. You’re already in it
You’re there. You’re surrounded by it. There’s nothing else to do but sew. And here’s the thing about sewing when you know you have no other priorities or responsibilities… You just keep going. You just get caught up in it and suddenly look at the time and it’s 8pm, but didn’t we just have dinner?
Hyperfocus is a miraculous thing.
And there’s really no friction to get started. You have a meal with everyone, and then collectively everyone gets up and starts sewing. No judgment, no guilt, and no laundry. You can just walk right back to your station.
The Show-And-Tell Effect
Something we do at our retreat that is a fan favorite is the show-and-tell. At the end of the retreat, everyone gets up and shows the group what they did at the retreat. And yes, it’s just like show-and-tell in kindergarten (except we have more words), and yes, people are just as excited to show their finished quilts as they were to show off their rock collection all of those years prior.
This gives people a natural deadline. They are highly motivated by the idea of wanting to share something really great and something finished. It doesn’t have to be finished in order to share it, but that’s what many people strive for.
The show-and-tell adds the emotional layer of celebrating your progress. Sitting alone in your sewing room and getting excited about how far your quilt has come is just not the same as showing your quilt to a room full of people who cheer for you.
Seeing others finish is also a great motivator. It makes you want to push through and finish, too. The more emotion is attached to an outcome, the more likely you are to do it. That’s just how the brain works.
Neuroscience says that the anticipation of a reward increases motivation. When we know we will be receiving a reward (whether it’s something tangible like our favorite sweet treat or something like a crowd of people cheering for us), our motivation skyrockets. There’s something about positive reinforcement that just gets us really excited and really invested. We work harder and potentially faster.
Social recognition is a strong motivator. It’s even stronger when the social recognition is coming from people we trust the most, like a room full of other quilters. Retreats are an intimate affair. It’s impossible to be surrounded by 30-40 other people with the same passions as you, doing those passions for days, and not make friends. It’s literally impossible.
So, the social recognition from peers and friends, and knowing that everyone is going to be cheering you on… That kind of inspiration is wild. It’s next level. There is no way to not finish that UFO that you brought to the retreat.
This is where you get a lot of finishing power from. Trust me, you’ll be amazed at what you actually accomplish in a seemingly short amount of time.
So, what should you bring if you want to finish something at your next retreat?
Your goal doesn’t always have to be finishing something. There’s an awful lot of pressure and stress that comes with that being the expectation. And you never know what your brain is suddenly going to want to do while you’re there. Trust me, there have been so many times I have gotten inspired by something someone else is working on, and then suddenly I am starting something brand new.
But my suggestion would be to bring a project that is roughly 70-90% finished already. If you just need some extra inspo to push through that last little bit, so you can wrap it up with a bow (not literally, but maybe literally…), something that is nearly there is the way to go.
You could also bring something that is stalled currently due to you being at the “boring” steps, i.e., binding, borders, and assembly. I have found that I am far more likely to get those parts done at a retreat when I get to chit-chat with my favorite quilters while I’m doing it. Distraction works every time.
Choose something finishable within the retreat timeframe. If you have a week-long retreat, what is something that you can finish within 7 days? This will be different than what you bring to a 4-day long retreat.
You can try:
- quilt tops waiting for borders
- half-finished rows
- long-ignored UFOs
Finishing isn’t about more will-power or better discipline.
It’s not about having better time management or making it a priority.
It’s about having the right environment, more momentum, and the right community. Your retreat community is your ride-or-die. They’re the 2am inspired text because your brain just had the best idea. They’re the ones you count down the days with until your next retreat together. They’re the ones you stay with when the retreat is close to their house.
I wrote a whole series on the benefits of quilting communities… and believe me, there’s a lot! Check out that series here.
How Quilting Communities Can Help Fight Loneliness
Creative Growth Happens Here: Inside The Magic Of Quilt Retreats
5 Ways To Get The Most From The Social Side Of Your Quilt Retreat
Oohs, Ahhs, and ‘You’ve Got This’: How Quilt Retreats Build Confidence
When the time is protected, the space is ready, and the people around you are all moving forward… finishing becomes the natural outcome, not something you have to work hard towards. It just happens.
That quilt you’ve been side-eyeing for six months? It might only be one retreat away from being done.
If you’re ready to finish that UFO and think a retreat might be the way to go, check out the next Bar Harbor Open Sew Retreat! Learn more here.